Ever

Oh, people.  Let me tell you about how to have a good the best day.

Take your children and your car to your parents house the night before so that in the morning, when the breadwinner goes off to win bread, you can sleep in (don’t forget to give them instructions about not waking you). Sleep in late.  I’m talking LATE.  You know? Eight o’clock. It will blow your mind!

Get up and drink a glass of water. Do a short workout dvd with weights.  Having no automobile (as you left it at your parents house), run over there in the most literal sense of that word. This should probably take you less than thirty minutes to accomplish, but repeatedly tell yourself to ‘shut up. completing this task is more awesome than completing it faster.’

Having arrived, play with your children for an hour or so.  Enjoy their wrestling and block buildings and general love of life.

Next, soak in a whirlpool tub for a while.  A long while.  Read a book while you do it. Make sure there are bubbles.

Enjoy your kids some more.

Go get a facial.What the heck, get a full body massage too.  You will want them both.  And it will rock your face off (not literally).

Ignore the horrible slushy sky and ground.  Go home to find your one year old fresh from a bath following an explosive after nap movement, happy and smelling sweet again.

Shower and ready yourself for dinner out.  Go to Ms. Get a Lahvosh (the Omaha or the Thai). Try a meaty cannelloni for an appetizer.  See what they’ve got on tap. Enjoy whatever suits you. Share the meal with a bunch of people you love.

Go home and relieve the fabulous baby sitters. Let your children sleep all through the night.

Repeat as necessary.

(Shout out to the people who made this all possible: The Jud, Poppy & Yaya, Ronke, Jan, a massage therapist, Adam & Lisa, Maria, Rachel, Gideon and Piper – you are some of my favorites. For real.)