Five

Dear Gideon,

Today you turn five years old and right now you are waiting patiently for your father to take you to preschool. He took the day off so that he could be with you and I think you understand how awesome that is. There are days when you and your sister cry when he leaves for work and although we all know that is the way it has to be, I think he feels the pull to stay with you too.

You opened presents from your grandparents yesterday and found, among other awesome items, a Star Wars Lego set. Everything else paled in comparison. Your party tomorrow, with guys from school and church, is Star Wars themed, as most of our days have been for some time now. Last October one of your classmates came to school as Darth Vader and your world moved from firefighting to intergalactic space adventure. Our house hasn’t been the same.

We tell stories about podracers and The Force. We run from room to room to save the galaxy from the Imperial forces. We watch You Tube video clips from all the episodes. You request them like this: May I please watch Star Wars Episode 4 Part 6? And most of the time, I say yes. You usually take the things you watch and then reenact them with your Legos. It’s inspiring and it’s fun.

Five years ago, when they placed you on my chest in Dallas, I didn’t really know what I was doing. I didn’t know how to soothe you or how to help you sleep. I didn’t know how to make sure you were eating enough or what to do if you got sick.

I couldn’t have imagined this day then. I wouldn’t have guessed you’d love math so much. That fractions would come naturally or that addition and subtraction answers would just be in your head without you having to work at it. I wouldn’t have guessed you’d be so observant, noticing everything from changes in the tree in our front yard to the mood changes in the room. I didn’t know that you’d have a better sense of direction than most adults and knack for maps and mazes.

But I knew then, just as I do now that I love you with a fierceness I cannot put into words. I know that you are fearfully and wonderfully made. I know that you are sinful and desperately wicked. I know that you have a Savior who gave Himself up for you so that you might be reconciled back to your Creator. I know that His love for you is even more intense than mine. I know that I am praying every day for you to grow up with a heart and head ready to obey the Father you can’t see even as we train you to obey the one you can.

Love,
Mama