Today a dude from the HR world called me to discuss one of my answers on a questionnaire. A long time ago, a different HR person told me that she would not help me set up my 401k stuff because it would be “too much work.” On the questionnaire there was no “denied access to 401k due to amount of effort required” so I created my own line. This, of course, set off alarms and whistles and things in the HR department, hence the call.
PHONE CALL NO 1
“Can you explain what this means?”
“Yes. When I was originally brought on in December [Name Withheld to Protect my Job Status] told me that she would not set up a 401k for me because it would be too much work.”
“And that was the extent of your conversation?”
“Essentially, yes.”
“Okay that’s all.”
PHONE CALL NO 2
“I guess I’m going to need a little more information.”
“Okay.”
“So, you should know that we were transferring from one company to another in January.”
“Yes, I did know that. That’s why she thought it was too much work.”
“So, then there was more to your conversation then you first told me.”
“Well, I suppose so, yes.” [I thought the change was the understood in the conversation]
“Did you know there were black out dates at the end of December?”
“No, I did not know that. All I know is that [Still Withholding] told me that she would prefer to not set up my healthcare or my 401k in December because everything was changing and because it would be so much work. I pushed for the healthcare benefits because I was paying out of pocket. I didn’t push the 401k because it did not matter as much.”
“And you currently do not have a 401k set up with us.”
“Right.”
“Did you know that you could have?”
“Yes, but the questionnaire was regarding the 2005 401k.”
“How did you know that you could have one in 2006?”
“Because of the paperwork I received and because [Holding] told me.”
“So she did tell you that you could sign up.”
[Kim beats head against wall]
Moral of the story: Being honest sometimes means people will twist your words and make you look like a liar. Excellent.