With Heartfelt Sorrow

Posted by on May 4, 2011 in Uncategorized | 0 comments

If there is anyone who will look back upon this silent year and a half, it will be Piper.  She’ll wonder why all of her babyness isn’t captured here and I won’t have any defense when she accuses me of not recording all of the things she was doing and when.  I wish I could’ve sweet, girl, but things got crazy for a while.  I’ll try to bring you up to speed now and hope you’ll extend me some grace.

I actually have pretty much no knowledge of the months between March and June. April came and went.  May was my birthday month and I remember that Ronke flew in and that your dad took me and some friends down to Kansas City to eat.  Those were some good times. And then the fogginess gives way to these thoughts:

June 2010 – Filled with painting your toe nails and letting you wear adorable sandals to fun places like the splash park and pool.  You had this tiny yellow swimsuit that was the most adorable little one every time we went swimming (even when other little girls whose mothers love Target were wearing the same ones).

July 2010 – One of your favorite people in the entire world, Rebecca, was in Mali again.  You made me watch every video with Rebecca in it while chanting “Meh Gecka, Meh Gecka, Meh Gecka” = More Becca, More Becca, More Becca!

We flew to the east coast where you did a fantastic job of being a lovely one year old. You  napped when you needed to and flexed like a champ. I was proud of you and very very  tired when we got home.

[I have pretty much no memory of what happened during this time except that the Nebraska football team spiraled into shame.  It was a tough year like that.]

October 27 2010 – You were a ballerina on this night and I have never seen a ballerina girl who could steal hearts like you.  Lovely and smiley and in love with dressing up. You randomly began demanding to wear your tutu again in February.  I made that thing myself (which, you know, is a fantastic accomplishment as I am the least crafty mom in the history of women who love their children) and it hasn’t held up all that well, but you love it just as much, if not more now as on that frosty October night.

November 25 2010 – We found out that we were going to have another baby in our house and I started thinking about how sad it would be for you to not be the baby anymore.  We waited until late December to tell you and Gideon about it and you understood right away that there was a baby in my tummy.  You kept trying to talk to her even after we told you that the baby had gone away. It was one of the saddest parts of that whole time.

November 28 2010  – Daddy and I went outside after we checked on you and Gideon, thinking we could hear you crying.  It was just the neighbors outside yelling at each other about the way one of them drives. Yikes.

December 17 2010 – We came home to find a giant inflatable penguin in our yard.  He was wearing a scarf and I was immediately sure of who had placed it there. You said hello to that penguin every morning and were always very sad if we didn’t have it inflated or when we finally confined it to the garage.

January 11 2011 – I had surgery to remove the baby that had stopped growing in my tummy. It was painful and I barely remember that week, which was especially sad because my cousin Jackie and her husband Chris had come to spend the week with all of us. You were so sweet to me, though.  You patted my arm and you gave me sweet little hugs, but I could see how scared you were too, and I’m sorry for crying so hard.

January 24 2011 – During a breakfast conversation you told knock knock jokes with punchlines about “Papa cookie Yaya.”

February 8 2011- I finally tried that pink sparkle bubble gum toothpaste you love.  It has the same after taste as vomit. I understood why Gideon refused to use it and I understand how deep your love of pink goes.  All the way to vomit.

February 16  2011 – You and your brother came down with a stomach flu that I thought might never leave. You were the saddest, snuggliest baby girl ever.  And I was so sad for you but loved all the cuddles too.

March 12 2011 – You had a pink birthday party. That was the theme you chose.  When I asked “What kind of cake do you want?” You said “Pink cake!” And when I tried to convince you that you could have Hello Kitty or Princesses or anything all you cared about was that they were PINK Hello Kitties and PINK Princesses.  We made it pink.  You loved it. In fact, you are still talking about it when people ask how old you are and it has almost been two months.  PINK!

March 16 2011 – You were officially potty trained.

April 29 2011 – Gideon asked you “What do you want to be when you grow up?” You replied by screaming in terror and then said, “I DON’T WANT TO THROW UP!”

This is getting way too long, even for a catch up post, so here. These photos should say it all….



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